gnidrolog prog y rubes merdum

Back in the 70s when I was trying to make music rather than play it our drummer's brother used to hang around a progressive group called Gnidrolog. I've just had one of those random moments when I remember bits from my fascinating past - this is far from fascinating.

So I checked 'em out on the Internet and got well scared.

These awful groups, playing unaccessible music with a degree of seriousness that should NEVER infect music, held the yout' in sway in the early 70s. As the music got worse their hair got longer and despair stalked the land. It was like pop's version of Thatcherism. These middle-class tossers piled on the pounds and the dandruff as their bank accounts bulged. The albums got bigger and worse and a sad nation weeped. And then along came the Sex Pistols and blew it all away in the wonderful summer of 1976. Yes, ELP, King Crimson, Pink Floyd, Genesis - they all died. Suddenly music opened up again, it was cool to like bands again, and we shook off the cobwebs.

I took my awful record collection to Littlehampton beach and threw the lot - every last one - into the sea, and started again. I discovered soul and jazz, then got into The Specials and Joy Division, they started dance music again via New Order and Manchester Rave, and then it was suddenly viable to be a DJ again.

Gnidrolog. Oh dear ...

automatic horrors view mumm-ra

NME Tour at the Carling Academy, Bristol, last night. Threatened with being returned home after a particularly gruelling post-viral coughing fit, I did make it to the show. The familiar sounds of Mumm-Ra assaulted us as soon as we got in and we realised quickly that we'd made the stupid mistake of missing part of the set. In fact we only heard three songs, luckily they finished on Out of the Question. Initial impressions were that the larger venue sapped some of Mumm-Ra's natural charisma, and that they were a bit more polished and distant than they were at the Louisiana back in November. Never mind ...

The Horrors were worse than bad. To his credit Faris kept his vocals well down in the mix - a neat reversal of the usual ego-infested turn it up to 11 attitude of most middle-class art school vocalist wimps. Problem was it made the sub-Specter wall of sound racket sound even worse, every song sounded the same and the band had about as much charisma as the Pope asleep. Expect them to all hold full time jobs in insurance or the media by 2008.

The View were okay, nothing special. The sound was a bit flat, and they show why drum, bass, rhythm and lead guitar alone are so limiting on sound texture and why many of the groups in the 80s got it right by ditching or enhancing the classic four piece elements. They won't endure, although I suspect they'll lead more interesting lives than the Horrors, being nice working class Scottish lads!

The Automatic were superb! Pennie goes into nutter mode INSTANTLY, no warm up required. The sound is crisp and clear, everything mixed just right. Pennie was over our side so we could watch his simian antics and Tokyo Olympics style gymnastics unhindered by heads. A class act all round!

To sum up the evening would have been excellent if only Mumm-Ra and the Automatic had been given the other two slots to fill, and if that bitch in the Mumm-Ra Out of the Question tee shirt had done the decent thing and given it to me in exchange for Trin's hand knitted puce hoody, rather than clutching it proprietorially throughout the show.

the search for appenzeller space schottl

To those of you that think Plan B or Mumm-Ra are hard-to-find or esoteric, try looking for something like Appenzeller Space Schottl! No myspace, no website and - until I dug further - nothing recorded. No Google images on their name ... until I used a few tricks.

They mix jazz and traditional Swiss Alpine music, rarely play outside of Appenzell (one of the smallest Swiss cantons) and have NEVER played the Louisiana. And I've never met anyone who's ever heard them or heard of them.

After an hour's hard Googling I've got this far - an image (and ordered a copy of the album which contains just one ASS track), visited a Russian website and found this on a Swiss website - which suggests there IS a full album out there which looks like the rest of my evening spoken for!

the new tom jones, innit?

So Plan B finally got over his cough and did a show at Bristol Uni on Saturday.

The venue was a bit Louisiana, a bit school hall - perfect. We had Professor Green as the support act, he was also helping to run the merchandise stall afterwards, and nicked our pen. We reckon he fancies Lady Sovereign 'cos he did a lovely rap about her.

After the Prof a bunch of hoodies came on stage. Then over the top came the unmistakeable voice of B, and we were off. It was an excellent show, even though he was losing his voice. We were a bit surprised by the teenyboppers in front of us who knew all the words and threw a burgundy trainer bra at him - which made him cross, like when his two friends died of heroin overdoses and stuff.

Then when he finished the show the crowd (mainly student toffs) started asking for an encore and Trin told everyone he wouldn't come back because he had a sore throat and she is a nurse so she should know.

Then he came back and did FOUR encores, run rave stuff and did his Tom Jones bit, innit ...

Catch B whilst he's still hungry 'cos he's going to be big.

better than Barrie?

Is DJing always enjoyable? Well I'd like to think so but things can go wrong and when your responsible for people having a great time and when you're being paid...well it can be a little stressful.
Last week we went to a new venue to see a DJ playing. Barrie's Saga Tunes. Barrie had a gold crushed velvet curtain over the front of his set and a sign made from glue and glitter, Barrie it yelled. Barrie it shone.
Barrie had a bow tie on. An enormous one. He said it kept the kiddies amused.
His equipment (not a double entendre BTW) was odd. Set up like the set of the Sooty Show. Lights on all three sides and a small hole he could pop his head in. He spoke in an American come Mike Reid accent after EVERY song. A little ditty about the songs.
He played a very odd mix of music. The Quo and The Jam and some Irish ditty and Gloria Estefan.
Rather fortunately we had to leave as I was getting up early the next day.
The following week we found ourselves in the same place as Barrie. I was a bit worried. If THAT was what they liked... then we didn't have a hope.....
We set up. Our gig is small and bright.I like to be seen and accessible.
Brassey set the CD on 2 tables. In the middle. We have always done that before.... never a problem.
The gig started. All was OK.... not a lot of people in (it was bloody cold outside)but we didn't mind.
Then the Cd's started jumping... not just a little but full blown unplayable. After about 6 of them jumping I began to get panicky. What the fuck?
Brassey said they were my Cd's and dirty, then his started to jump too.
We cleaned the discs. They still jumped. Then I looked under the CD player. The tables were so unlevel one of the feet of the player was rocking very slightly t enough to make stuff jump. Also the tables were really crap and uneven.
After a while we took a deep breath and told the dance floor to hang on a sec and moved the CD player.... it would have been OK but Brassey accidentally switched off the amp... so, panic and no music until I realised what had happened. The dance floor were unfazed though.
It was a bit better, we still had a couple of minor jumps. Then Brassey tripped over a lead whilst the dance floor was busy and pulled out the electric.... total silence.... replug... reset and miraculously the dance floor got back up.
I was soooooo relieved when it was over. We have NEVER played such a problematic gig.
I felt a bit down and miserable. Then someone approached me. She asked us when we were playing there again. She loved our music. Her mates had all loved it. She said we were million times better than good old Barrie.... she never danced when he played there.
She made my night.
So, is it all fun? well no. I guess even top DJ's have to learn to cope with things going not quite the way you'd planned them. But at the end of the day the people still enjoyed our music.
Made it all worth it.
(BTW we played every single one of those bloody jumpy cds the next day at home and not one of those fuckers jumped. A combination of bad tables and jumpy wooden stage.
Grrrr)