einsturtzende neubauten

Ugh! Tross alert! The other night the fellow above appeared on BBC, late at night. It was horrible, so horrible I sat transfixed and watched him miserably trawl through a clutch of the most maudlin, tuneless, life-quenching drivel that I've ever heard. Songs with no character, no point, no joy. I don't know what his day job is but I'd suggest he doesn't try to make a career in music! He made James Blunt and Pink Floyd seem average, quite an achievement.

His name is Paul Simon and he even has a website! Don't bother to check it out - with music as bad as his he's likely to find it difficult to pay the hosting fees!

Right, I'm off to listen to Mumm-Ra!

it says nothing to me about my life

Music is approximately 98% tross. This is hardly a controversial statement. But why is it tross? If we look at supply and demand economics we may find a clue. On the demand side there are far too many people who don't actually care about music, are ignorant about what's out there or are so riddled with irony, anomie and schadenfreude that they'd rather be cantankerous fuckers than fill their lives with pleasure. There are also far too many addled old ladies and terminally uncool uncles that buy music as presents.

On the supply side there are far too many people who think that music is a career path and that the content of what they create should be aimed at those demand side trossers listed above. It's a self-perpetuating cycle. Too many musicians are egotists, which kills creativity. Too many are upper middle-class well connected pretty boys and girls who wouldn't know a good song if it did a projectile vomit down the back of their neck.

So what can we do about it? Mass murder is sadly not an option, but we can chip away at the monolith of uncoolness. Brassey and Trin bring great music to the most unlikeliest of audiences - and the response is usually 'brilliant disco'. And tracks and tracks will always report on those little gems we've found, CDs and live artists, classic tracks and new bands.

Check out MIA, Mumm-Ra, Attwenger, Hot Chip, Marvin Gaye, Chopin.

Attack Elton, Morrisey, Westlife, Pink Floyd, Handel, Acker and just about everyone else.

We're up for it, you going to join us?

god doesn't party

I never GOT Bloc Party. I remember NME hailing them as the saviours of Indie. Bet that made Arctic Monkeys laugh. Bloc Party are something and nothing. I'm not knocking them in particular. EXCEPT..... WTF is this? Do we assume Bloc Party are Christian and owe their minor success to God?
Or is it Irony? Hmmmm, next thing will be the fishy sign on the drum kit.

track and destroy

London a short while back. I love London. Brassey can't stand it with it's noise and hustle but I'm fascinated by the way the place works. I couldn't live there... Well not for too long.
London's music scene is vast from the tiny little venues to the cool places like Camden and the huge events. Apparently George Michael is doing a free gig for NHS Nurses in Wembley. No idea why though. My manager came around today asking us all if we wanted to go. Hmmm I think not somehow.
This trip to London was when I heard Lacuna Coil for the first time, I think we were some Virgin Megastore and the sound was so massive that I had to check them out. Cristina Scabbia is a brilliant lead vocalist. Her persona makes the band. She's also damn sexy and check out her shoes... I want them!
I was listening to the radio again today as I inched my way through the vile Bristol Traffic (I want tube trains) It was your favourite track afternoon again. People rang in with the track that made their day. Today's was Girls Aloud "Something Kinda Oooh"
I despair. I may have to change to Radio Four.... I want XFM. Yep London has it all.

set fire to all the bars except the louisiana

"Pickin up the pieces
Of the wreck you went and left
And I'm dealing with dilemmas
In my not-so-stressful life
And I'm drinking stronger spirits
I made my home here on the floor
And I'm losing all ambition
I'm a ghost"

Paolo Nutini 2006

There's nothing Brassey hates more than some miserable bastard crooning about some misfortune in a song. In the car today we heard some Paolo Nutini lyrics and were just about ready to slit out throats. Don't get me wrong. I know he's a beautiful guitarist and he is very popular (ummm amongst grannies maybe?)
Maybe it's because I've listened to my fair share of rock bottom lyrics when I was rock bottom. I cried a million tears to some lyric that dragged me from sinking to sunk. And at times there were a place for them. Sometimes they were like a comforting arm around me. Because they seemed to understand where so many humans didn't.
However I am very pleased to see Snow Patrol and Martha Wainwright's collaboration "Set Fire To The Third Bar" on the Radio One playlist.
I can't actually tell you why this song which, on surface level, seems just as sad as Nutini's effort, really pleases me.
Maybe it is the collaboration. Martha Wainwright who is Rufus's very talented sister deserves more recognition than she gets. Though she has a huge following including my very good friend Jude.
The track is gentle and pretty but builds and their voices match perfectly. You really can believe they're in love. Maybe we all need a love song now and then... fuck off Robbie Williams with his Angels crap. Love songs should be about love.

"After I have travelled so far
We'd set the fire to the third bar
We'd share each other like an island
Until exhausted, close our eyelids
And dreaming, pick up from
The last place we left off
Your soft skin is weeping
A joy you can't keep in

I'm miles from where you are,
I lay down on the cold ground
And I, I pray that something picks me up
and sets me down in your warm arms"

Snow Patrol ft Martha Wainwright 2006
Hmmm maybe I'm getting soft. It's all Brassey's fault. I do love him.
:)

M.I.A homage

"I'll hard drive your bit
I'm battered by your sumo grip
Lucky I like feeling shit
My Stamina can take it
Gymnastics Super Fit
Muscle in the gun clip
Bite, Teeth Nose Bleed
Tied up in a scarf piece

What you Want
Bucky Done Gun
What you want
The Fire Done Burn
What you want
Bucky Done Gun
Get Crackin' Get Get Crackin' "

M.I.A Bucky Done Gun 2005

M.I.A. Remember the name. Forget the ponsey charmed rich lifestyles of so called artists, forget Kanye West and Jay Z.
Maya is a gritty talented song writer and artist with so much life experience to draw from to make her music raw and real and different. Born in London but moved back to Sri Lanka to her home country at age 6 months, Maya's family were active in the political storm in the country at the time. Her father was a founder member of EROS a militant Tamil group. The family lived in Maya's grandparents home without electricity or running water and lived in fear of her father being taken away to serve in the army. Civil war in Sri Lanka forced them to leave for a while but it was a harsh time and Maya's sister became ill with Typhoid. They were forced through hunger and illness to move back to Sri Lanka with the extended family. But war escalated sharply and even with Tamil's being shot at the border every day Maya's mother managed to flee to England with her three kids. They were housed as refugees in a notoriously racist council estate in Mitcham, Surrey. Maya learnt English and pushed on with her life winning a place at a top London art school. A talented and creative person.. A war child she delved into music, her real love and M.I.A began.
Given a chance to support Peaches in concert and then signed by XL recordings whose stars include Dizzy Rascal and the White Stripes.
M.I.A have it all. Talent, grit, history and colour. Maya fought all the way from a baby to make it today.
The Album Arular was out last year.
MTV write

"It has lyrics that mix Tamil, Cockney and American Slang to her tracksuits and hoodies specially sewn from the brightest boldest African print fabrics. M.I.A Creates culture clashes that work"

Bored with music? I can assure you you'll never be bored with Maya.

men with stools yet again

Westlife are number one? WTF? I don't get it. Thing is they didn't even chart in the download charts, so how could they get to number one?
Seems Westlife have this huge fanbase who don't care what crap they dish out . It says Westlife so they'll buy it.
If Westlife are on TV with some silly best pop music competition. It wouldn't matter that they only released one song that year... That the song was a cover and a bad one at that. They'll win. It's a cert.
I don't get it. Are there really such people out there with such bad music taste?
I used to think it was teen voters. But those teens must have grown up now.
They HAVE to have discovered Kasabian and Muse or even Justin Timberlake, don't they?
Humour me someone.

firework disco sparklers punch

Typical Brassey and Trin fans exhibiting a high level of interaction ...



The crowds got so big they spilled out into the garden ...



The party was so banging that several dancers' fingers spontaneously caught fire.



Brassey and Trin's First Annual Fireworks Bash in stuffy Hartcliffe, south Bristol. It gave us the chance to try a few new killer tracks, including Mumm-Ra's 'Out of the Question'. We had nearly double the number we had last week in Horningsham, an empty hall being replaced by a bulging house. 

not 'Out of the Question'........

"Light out of the darkness, what did you see? What did you see?
And I, I don't see the likeness I'm trying to see, I'm trying to see.

If you believe me look in my eyes,
As you deny me don't read the sign,
You can't be the reason,
You can't be the reason,
You won't be the reason,
You won't be the reason for all the things I said.
It's out of the question,
It's out of the question,
Or out of the question,
Or out of the question.
I'd rather stop it dead.

This is the only thing I know. The writing's on the wall. The master's stand and fall.
So I, I can't seem to notice. I'll try to explain, I'll try to explain".

Ok so I know Brassey has already done a Mumm-ra Review down there somewhere and I agree with everything he says... (eeek don't murder us in our beds 'Amusement Parks On Fire')
I love the Louisiana. It's so small and intimate but vibrant and fresh... still so bloody fresh after all these years. I've seen lots of bands there. The most famous was Interpol who opened the door for us on the way in and signed our NME, which the support band tried to steal later in the evening and I had to send my NY mate Ann in to sort the gits out.
She always told me I should hang out there... meet someone cool..into music. Hey.. I met someone really cool and he loves the Louisiana too (loves you Brassey)
So me and him decide to go see Mumm-ra. Heard good stuff about them... did we believe the hype though?
Well. we like to keep an open mind. I prefer live music to anything. I like to see if they can really play, really sing, really project.
I asked Brassey if he wanted a Mumm-ra tee-shirt. No he said emphatically.
Ok, I thought... sod off then git. I put me tenner back in my purse and thought about all the crochet wool I could buy with it the next day.
Then they came on and for an hour we were mesmorized, They were bloody great. They played like rock stars, they had the crowd by it's balls. They had great hair and a plastic duck called Matthew. Best live group I've seen in a long long time.
We were at the front, the crowd were a mixed bunch... young old and weird. I'm sure some were from the local 'home' on Coronation Road. A tall ginger giant who bounced like a rubber ball all night. His ginger ringlets hitting the surrounding people full pelt. 'Noo' (lead singer) said he wanted the same thing HE was on.
I went to the bar to get drinks. Ginger Giant pushed in the queue in front of me. I was pissed off but had to laugh when he ordered a diet coke with ice and lemon.
Right at the front were the girlie groupies with their lip gloss and vest tops. They knew all the words and were shouting out pouty provocations to the band. I had to stop Brassey joining in.
Then it ended so quickly with Mumm-ra's next single 'Out of the Question'. The crowd wanted more. I actually dislike encores... that's old fashioned guys!! They didn't come back on.
So home we go...... and we get to the front door and Brassey says "I want a Mumm-ra tee-shirt"
Fucker!

teenage night out

Me, Simon, Suki, Wurzel, Bumbag and Tyrone were dead bored Saturday coz we couldn't get to Warminster Carnival as the next bus wasn't for six days and we so are not walking so we went to the village disco. We dressed up as monsters and schoolgirls and stuff, took a 24 pack of Carlsberg (Wurzel's dad bought if from the offy for us) and went along.

There were some oldies there, both dancing and doing the disco. You'd think they'd know better, crinkly fuckers. The music was awful - bloody trance and dance stuff, old folk's rubbish. Why do you bother grandad? We didn't even know a lot of the stuff - that townie indie stuff like the Kooks. Why don't old people just die? I hate them.

Anyway Suki went up to the grannie DJ and asked for some well cool stuff - Bryan Adams and Bon Jovi. She didn't have it! What sort of disco was this? Mind you I wouldn't have danced if she had had it - I just wanted to listen and pose and look unbearably cool and frighten the crinklies. So then Bumbag suggests we should ask for some well cool dance stuff as she and Suki wanted to sweat. The best dance song ever is Cha Cha Slide and luckily the 'DJ' had it and we gave it the full works, like Pan's People on speed. The oldies left although the DJs stayed. It's past your bedtimes Gramps! Let us have the decks and we'll play our music.

So then we sits outside and listen to the badgers and owls - better than the bloody music.

I can't wait till all old people are dead and we run the world, with OUR music. Queen and Bryan and the Jovi RULE.

Next day I heard the grannies grumbling as they shifted their equipment saying they wouldn't play Horningsham again coz we was a bunch of uncool wankers!

Us? That's so not true. Watch out world, coz we're the next generation ... 

all hail the mighty mumm-ra!

The Louisiana in the Bristol night ...



Mumm-Ra raise the audience from the dead after Amusement Parks on Fire - notice the lady smoking which is TOTALLY against the rules.



Noo singing and playing the guitar at the same time - shame it's an unmiked acoustic!



Day after day, band after band ...

I've been playing in bands for years and seen hundreds, but I'd never played in a place as small as the Louisiana - even Littlehampton Guide Hut was bigger - and I don't think I've ever seen a better band than Mumm-Ra. They got everything right. Perhaps it's just the unbeatable atmosphere of the Louisiana - more jazz club than rock venue, or because they're from Sussex, or because I'm still in the throes of glandular fever, but Mumm-Ra had an aura of potential greatness about them.

And we fucking saw 'em at the Louisiana with about 80 other punters!

The best thing was their sense of fun - they LOVE doing this! Noo is a genius frontman, a natural showman. But they're also as tight as fuckery and polished as Yul Brynner's head. The songs have hooks that you almost recognise straight away and you can dance to 'em. What more d'you want from a band? They were such a contrast to miserabalist, talentless, egotist Amusement Parks on Fire (the 'support' band) that I felt we'd run the whole gamut of potential in under two hours. How The Automatic managed with Mumm-Ra as support I can't imagine! I bet Pennie shat his pants!!

Anyway, catch 'em before they go off the boil, the smaller the venue the better, and make sure that a 6 foot 8 clone of Bonnie Langford isn't in the audience - this fucker will do everything he can to block your view!